It Says "F R A G I L E" -- Must be Italian

Happy Father's Day!

I won the Father's Day drawing at the cigar bar, and received a magnificent prize.

It's a kegorator decorated with Oliva V cigars.

So why is it that someone thinks it's really this in disguise?

I wonder.

Anyway, I love it.

How *Not* to Liqidate

WTF is it with these people running corporate liquidations? Is the concept so difficult?

The purpose of a liquidation is to turn a hard asset in to cash. To do that, you price the hard asset so that it is so attractive, the conversion to cash is instantaneous. This is Bankruptcy 101.

But then again, there are people in the corporate world who seem to survive in spite of themselves. Ultimately, they will fail. Gloriously.

A recent example of this came early this year, when Circuit City went Chapter 7, and began to liquidate.

Back in December, as a Christmas present for someone, I purchased a GPS navigation system from Circuit City. They were in Chapter 11 reorganization at that point in time, ready to poise themselves for the future. The GPS system I bought sold "on special" for Christmas, for $99.00.

Later, in January, Circuit City announced that their reorganization plan didn't pan out, they were forced to go out of business, and liquidate their inventory. I returned to the same store, to purchase the same item, but now they were looking to immediately liquidate.

A rational human being would assume that if your intent is to liquidate, and you advertise savings of40 to 90%, that your prices would be cheaper in January than they were in December. This turned out to be not the case.

The same item I purchased for Christmas for $99, was liquidation priced in January at....

..... $170.

Dumbasses.

I was ready and willing to purchase 2 or 3 of these, assuming the pricing would be around 70 bucks. Not a chance. Apparently, when you hire 3 consulting firms to set your liquidation pricing, it ends up working exactly as though your congressman was buying a toilet seat.

This brings me to my current thing to bitch about.

Chrysler's "reorganization."

Without comment on the fascist takeover of Chrysler by the Federal government, as part of the Chapter 11 reorganization plan, Chrysler cast several hundred dealerships off in to the cosmos. Those dealerships were required to liquidate their Chrysler inventory by the close of business today.

I think the shmucks who worked the Circuit City liquidation were also the consultants for my local "going out of business" Chrysler dealers.

I priced a vehicle from the dealer back in February, when they were running the "employee pricing" promotion. The vehicle I sought was then priced at fifteen-five. I did not purchase it.

Yesterday, I had a nice discussion with a salesperson from a liquidating Chrysler dealer. He gave me his liquidation price on the same vehicle I looked at back in February. The liquidation price? Wait for it.....

....... Seventeen five.

Are you shittin' me?

There was even a TV news story about people turning up at that dealership looking for bargains, and turning away saying "we thought the prices would be better."

Know what? You liquidation clowns can't differentiate your asses from a hole in the ground. In some circles, I'm considered an "expert" in bankruptcies. From my expert viewpoint, you morons have completely missed the point. I hope you drive my car all the way to the bank.

Suits. Ties. Heads deeply embedded in your asses. Nice.

Credit to The Godfather

I didn't write this, I'm just repeating it.


Chief Justice John Roberts said today: "I would hope that a wise White man, with the richness of his experience, would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a Latina woman who hasn't lived that life."

What a racist pig.





Ooooops. My bad. Actually the quote if from Justice Sonia Sotomayor, nominee to the Supreme Court of the United States. She said:




"I would hope that a wise Latina woman, with the richness of her experience, would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who hasn't lived that life."

If one statement is racist, isn't the other one? Yeah, let's see whether or not Katie Couric brings *that* up. (Or the New York Times, Washington Post, yada yada yada)

Racism is racism.

What's Wrong with this Picture?

Sometimes something just strikes you funny.

My beverage of choice these days is a fine pour of a Guiness draft. When that's not available, I return to my old standby, Heineken.

This afternoon I was seated at the bar of an upscale Irish Pub, the kind that has a multitude of fine imported beers on draft. (Or as we used to call it in New Yawk, "on tap")

I recall years ago having a discussion with a bar manager over the price of one of his beers. There was a big chalk sign behind the bar which read, "All Domestic Drafts, $2.00." I was then of course shocked when the bartender charged me $4.50 for a Killian's Irish Red. I engaged the bar manager, who plainly stated that Killian's was a premium import. For some reason I failed to convince him that Golden, Colorado was located within the bounds of the United States, and was thus not an "import." Ultimately, the sign was changed to read, "All Domestic Drafts, $2.00 (except Killian's)."

So today, I was enjoying a fine pint of Guiness when three tourists sauntered up to the bar to sample the wares. They looked at the pipes (the industry term for the beers available on draft) and nothing seemed to meet their needs. Finally, the bartender said this, and I quote:

"We also have many domestic beers in bottles, we have Corona, Corona Light, Heineken, Heineken Light and many others."

I smiled, said nothing, and finished my drink. Sometimes life is just funny.

Heroes II - My Heroes

It's been an impressive past 7 days.

District All-star; Most Valuable Player; National Honor Society inductee. She's my hero.

The other one?

Yesterday became Airman Basic. Sworn to support and defend the Constitution of the United States, against all enemies foreign and domestic, so help him god. When you consider this is a time of war, voluntary enlistment is pretty heroic.

They're my heroes.

Nobody Cares Anymore

Bullet 399

Or more precisely, it’s known as Commission Exhibit 399.

In order to believe that President Kennedy was killed by Lee Oswald acting alone, you must believe this:

This bullet was fired by Oswald using a cheap Italian Carcano rifle.

The round passed through the back of Kennedy’s neck (about 3 inches higher than his wounds indicated), out the front of his neck, nicked Kennedy’s necktie, then it hung in the air for two seconds doing nothing, then moved right 4 inches, then struck Governor Connoly in the back, broke his rib exiting from the front of his chest, entered his wrist, exited his wrist, and came to its final stop in the governor’s thigh.

You then have to believe that this bullet magically exited his thigh while he was on a stretcher at Parkland Hospital in Dallas, found by “someone.”

My God, this must be a magical bullet.

It’s magical because, well…. Hey -- have a look:

Did this bullet do all of that? Holy shit, this bullet really is effin magical.

Because if you take the same rifle and the same kind of bullet and shoot it through just the wrist of some poor bastard cadaver volunteer, you get this: (skipping the in the neck, out of the neck, in the back, breaking the rib, out of the chest and in to the thigh)

Damn.

The reality is bullet 399 did none of these things. But in order to perpetrate the greatest fraud in the history of the United States of America, someone created the story of bullet 399.

That person is….wait for it…wait for it…

Senator Arlen Specter.

Senator Specter was a staff attorney for one of the members of the Warren Commission. It was he who proposed the single-bullet theory which became the core of the Warren Commission report.

It is so blatantly bullshit that it is laughable.

The early 1960’s was a different time in America. The post-war prosperity of the late 40’s and the 50’s created an innocent utopia. We didn’t question our government or its authority, and the young charismatic President was just what we all wanted.

The cold-blooded murder of that President changed it all. But yet, an innocent and naive populace had no impetus to believe the truth. They didn’t question authority. All the bullshit of the late 60’s, the hating of the “man”, the belief that Nixon was worse than the Nazis, it all stemmed from the fact that no one in 1964 wanted to see the truth. That truth was that we were no different than a third-world country where governments are overthrown by force and not governed by law.

This is the legacy of Arlen Specter. This man had no quest for the truth. This despicable human being used whatever power and influence he had to sell the commission and the citizens of the United States on a bullshit story that could somehow remotely fit the fairytale that they wanted to sell.

F**k you Senator Specter. That’s my respect.

To my friends on the left side of the aisle (figuratively, since as I recall they’re actually on the right side of the aisle) you can fucking have him.

All the anger you tried to release in the 60’s was the result of his work. He alone created the tulmultuous era you lived through. Bless you all.

For those of you who don’t know why I chose today to go on this rant, you have my love. For those of you who do, let’s get off our ass and do something about it.

Heroes

"Nine times out of ten, a hero is someone who is tired enough, cold enough, and hungry enough not to give a damn. I don’t give a damn.”- Hawkeye Pierce

I have a new hero.


Beyond any question, Sully is a hero.

Without at doubt, Richard Phillips is a hero.

Yesterday, I found a new one.



He is Gov. Rick Perry of Texas.

Finally somebody says out loud what needs to be said loud and clear: “I believe that our federal government has become oppressive in its size, its intrusion into the lives of our citizens, and its interference with the affairs of our state...That is why I am here today to express my unwavering support for efforts all across our country to reaffirm the states-rights affirmed by the Tenth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. I believe that returning to the letter and spirit of the U.S. Constitution and its essential 10th Amendment will free our state from undue regulations, and ultimately strengthen our Union." Perry continued: "Millions of Texans are tired of Washington, DC trying to come down here to tell us how to run Texas."

For those of you educated in government schools, you may not know what the 10th amendment to the United States Constitution says, but I assure you it is as important as any other written words you will read. Witnesseth:

Amendment X
The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.

It’s that simple. The people (you know, “We the People” (perhaps the only part of the U.S. Constitution known by most citizens)) delegated powers to the United States. They are specific powers, they are listed in the Constitution. Those that were not delegated to the United States are reserved to the States or the people.

This is an easy concept. It’s sadly not taught in our schools, but the framers wished to protect the sovereignty of the people and their States. The government of the United States is ignoring it, and it *has* been ignoring it since FDR.

Governor Perry says it’s time to take it back.

Bravo. Gov. Perry, this Bud’s for you.